Skip to main content

Does your ex want you to be friends? Watch out! Science has a theory

If you have recently noticed that your ex has removed you from his Facebook friends, it could be because he has heard about a new somewhat disturbing psychological investigation.

Does your ex want you to be friends? Watch out! Science has a theory

A study published by researchers at the University of Oakland found that people with "dark" personality traits, that is, those who are generally unpleasant, manipulators and exploiters, they were more likely to be friends with former for practical and sexual reasons.

This is how researchers came to these conclusions.First, asked about out of 350 people who gave a lot of reasons to continue maintaining friendship with a former .They divided the reasons into 150 factors that in turn assigned to different categories that included; reliability, sentimentality, pragmatism and sexual access.

For example, "I knew how to listen" would go into reliability or sentimentality ; "I could borrow money" would enter the pragmatism ; and "We could still go to bed from time to time" would enter the sexual access.

Next, the researchers asked another group of about 500 people to evaluate the importance of each of the approximately 150 reasons to continue feeling friends with a former hypothetical. Finally, the group performed 500 personality tests that measured dark personality traits, as well as honesty.

Does your ex want you to be friends? Watch out! Science has a theory

The results showed that the participants who scored higher in the measures of the dark personality, they were more likely to cite pragmatic reasons for maintaining friendship with an ex .Meanwhile, the participants who scored low on honesty and humility were more prone to citing reasons related to sexual access.

These results make sense, since previous research had found that the value of dark personality types used to value sex, the value of money and power, and could be more manipulative.

Other interesting conclusion is that in general At the time, people classified as trustworthy or sentimental obtained the lowest score for pragmatism or sexual access.As for gender differences, men were more likely than women to point out pragmatic factors , and sexual access was an important reason for maintaining friendship with an ex.

The lesson here is not that if you are friends with your ex, it is because he is using you.In fact, if your friendship works well and makes you happy, then you probably do not need to do anything about it. But if you notice that your ex comes back only when he needs something, be careful .It could be a sign that that person is not the most stable or benevolent of your life, and that you would do well to spend less time with this one.

If you liked this topic you cannot miss our article about why for your brain, to burn, and suffer an emotional breakdown, it is “almost” the same

Image: Kalun L and Emilien ETIENNE via Flickr

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The disadvantages of being very smart. Do you recognize them?

Maybe you think you would be happier and your life would be easier and more satisfying if you were a little smarter, but hardly that would happen, since sometimes it can be a curse .the inconveniences of being very smart? Discover some! The inconveniences of being very intelligent.Do you recognize them? When someone is very intelligent, they almost immediately feel the weight of people's expectations, since being perceived as someone brilliant, others expect no less than perfection in each of their acts. Science reveals the main drawbacks of being very intelligent.you are, you may be identified.Here we go! You can bother others by correcting them Nobody likes to know that he is wrong or that what he says is wrong, and if you are intelligent and you know that the other person is making a mistake, the most normal thing for you is to correct it. That can make people get offended or upset, and lose some friends. If you see people move away and now They don't talk...

Bipolar disorder: are you sure you know what it is?

People with bipolar disorder often have elevated and depressed mood cycles that fit the description of "manic depression." When a person's disease follows this classic pattern, the diagnosis of Bipolar disorder is relatively easy. Bipolar disorder: are you sure you know what it is? However, bipolar disorder can be cunning.Symptoms can challenge the manic sequence.Depressive expected.Uncommon episodes of mild mania or hypomania may go unnoticed. Depression can overshadow other aspects of the disease and substance abuse can breach the image.Together, these factors make bipolar disorder surprisingly difficult to diagnose. In fact, about half of people with bipolar disorder have seen three professionals before being correctly diagnosed. It takes an average of 10 years for people to enter the treatment of this condition, after symptoms begin.This is partly caused by delays in diagnosis. Bipolar disorder usually begins to manifest in adolescence.And the truth ...

Can science guess if you're getting married?

Is he or she the chosen one? You know, the one to introduce to your parents, who you want to live with, start a family, that one or the one you marry? At some point in each relationship, these questions come to light. Psychology researchers are also asking the same questions.Are there any recognizable signs that can predict where you are going? A relationship? How do you know how a relationship fluctuates with time? A recently published study examined this issue by following how relationships evolved over time through people's own changing senses. Tracing the course of love Some days of your relationship you may feel that you will be happy forever, while other days you feel that you will not be happy or eat partridges.Researchers believe that in these sensations the key of whether your relationship will end in marriage or not . If you could trace the story of your relationship, what would it look like? Maybe a straight upward line that shows constant progress? Or m...

How to see what Google saves from you if you have an Android

Without realizing it, Google is accumulating information about us , about our tastes, preferences and displacements .According to those who know offers us help or articles that you think can We are interested, but it does not stop a little scary all the information you have about us .Many times we give permissions without knowing exactly what we do.If you have NOT denied access to your information, when you use Google Chrome , save the searches , also save the emails through Gmail ; You'll know where places you've been if you've used Google Maps or the information and the most visited pages with your Android.Naturally, accumulate information as long as you allow it and that you have a device with the features required by Google .The company gives us the ability to "disconnect" and if so We do it, in principle it will not save all that information. Google Analythics offers us a complement to the browser bar that will not collect our informatio...

How to avoid jealousy. You can get it with these 4 tips!

Feeling jealous is terrible.This emotion is tremendously complex, since it encompasses many feelings at the same time.It is not necessary to have a partner to feel this way, but it is common that they manifest in a relationship of two.In Lifestyle we give you advice on how to avoid jealousy. Don't you know how to avoid jealousy? You can get it with these 4 tips! It is normal to become jealous at a time in our life.What is not normal is to take an obsessive and violent behavior.Instead of denying or avoiding this emotion , What we have to do is question why we are jealous , every time they invade us. 1-Don't get obsessed One thing is to feel jealous and another very different is to become obsessed.When you get to this point, you see the reality distorted.Everything is as you imagine it and not as it really is.To think that your partner is flirting with someone else all the time, It will become an obsessive attitude.Remember that you must first ask yourself why you fe...

Somatize | 3 curiosities of when the mind makes us sick

Some people suffer physical pain or discomfort caused by the mind , we call this disorder somatization.Most cases occur due to high levels of anxiety caused by stress.that the symptoms are real, they do not come from any physical damage but from mental disorders.Some of the pains that can be suffered from somatization are headaches, chest discomforts or muscle discomforts.If you want to know more curiosities about somatizing a disease, you just have to finish reading this article. Doctors should be very careful and not rule out any other diagnosable disease, since even if the patient suffers a somatization disorder You can also suffer from other ailments that should not be hidden.People who often have this disorder often go to alcohol or drugs to try to mitigate it, although the result is usually the reverse which is sought at the beginning.Thanks to this article, you can know the symptoms, most common personality traits of people who tend to somatize a disease and the best treat...

Can thoughts influence our health?

Have you ever heard the expression "the power of thought" ? That before we do something we first think about it? Or in the Catholic religion, for example, the bounty of "in thoughts, words and deeds"? In any process, thinking is always the first step.Does it also occur in our health? Can thoughts really influence us? How do they influence our mood or self-esteem? self-esteem is the interpretation or assessment that we make of ourselves, it is the ability to love, appreciate, value and accept ourselves as we are.In that sense, when we have negative thoughts about our abilities we are feeding unnecessary situations of stress, anxiety and suffering , directly influencing our mood.The mood depends on the reading we make of the environment around us.There is nothing wrong or good in itself, it is our perception of the facts that determines how we feel .And the perception is given, in large part, by our thoughts. For example, if an import is coming I examine...

The largest family in the world | 39 wives and 94 children

Decades ago, the existence of very large families in our towns and cities was still common.Having 10 or more children was relatively normal and, unfortunately in many cases, less than half reached adulthood.sanitary conditions and contraceptive methods, which are available to almost everyone, have caused the number of children per family unit to drop dramatically and despite this the world population increases day by day.In many countries governments have reduced number of children necessary to be considered a "large family" that has been established in 3 children.The family we are going to talk about breaks all the schemes. It is the most numerous family of the World: 39 wives and 94 children . The existence of such a large family based on polygamy would not be possible in most countries of the world.India seems to be more tolerant and permissive in this aspect since the family v ive in the Indian state of Mizaram, border with Bangladesh and Myanmar. The largest fami...

Discover a SUPERBACTERIA resistant to all antibiotics!

Sometimes the worst catastrophes are arriving in silence and without being noticed , as happened with AIDS in the 80s, or with Ebola in Africa in the 90s.Instead, diseases that are they announce as potential pandemics, such as bird flu, which mobilized governments and enriched pharmaceutical multinationals, end up causing less damage than that caused by normal flu that attacks every year. This may not be the case for the recently discovered superbacterium, and it is certainly the first warning of an international health disaster to come. A SUPERBACTERY discovered that is resistant to all antibiotics! In November 2015, it was discovered in China a strain of Escherichia Coli in pork and humans, with a gene, the MCR-1, which makes it resistant to all antibiotics developed by the human being so far.A few months later the presence of this bacterium was reported in Europe and Latin America, and in May 2016 the first case in the United States was reported in a patient with a urina...

Kevin Carter's Vulture: the story behind an image

As they say, a picture is worth a thousand words.And this picture went around the world and meant a Pullitzer in 1994 to the author who was able to capture this fragment of time., who set the framework for this harsh reality.That essence that hurts and hurts, but somehow, we have also normalized on the screens of our televisions. A picture is worth a thousand words.But, What happens when those words become wrong darts and end up creating a story that is not entirely true? Kevin Carter, the photographer who traveled to the Sudanese village of Ayod to denounce the famine of this country, ended up taking his own life a year after capturing this image. We invite you to know the two stories that weave this shocking photography. And then, Kevin Carter...did you help the girl? Sometimes the legends dress in the blackest veil: that of drama and tragedy.And this is what, in a way, happened to Kevin Carter .This South African graphic reporter already had a lot filming in th...